Useful Tips and Ideas to Keep in Mind When Dating a Mormon
Sep 17, What are the basic rules of mormon dating? I'm not mormon, but this girl I like is, and I was. (Regular kissing is fine, as is hugging. So, John, thinking that this girl was single, puts soem moves on her. .. new standards personally about kissing, and the person I am dating. Dear Ask Mormon Girl, I'm a fairly average non-LDS guy. I respect you, and I want to respect your standards. . If she is PG-rated, you can end your date on a couch, so the intelligent kissing technique is to kiss her mouth.
Mormon children are advised, in their religion, to refrain from dating until they are at least 16 years of age. Hence, ensure that the girl or guy you want to date is above 16; although with changing times, some kids may date younger, if your love interest is not keen on going out until 16, then hold off.
If you are willing to wait, then well and good; otherwise, it is best to move on. Also, they are encouraged to date in groups and not pair off alone, so if your date insists on the same, then agree politely. Mormons are very particular about dressing. They believe that the body is a temple that needs to be worshiped, and that inner beauty is more important. They are always dressed in decent clothing, and the same is expected of their date. So if you are dating a Mormon guy, always wear knee-length, avoid tiny shorts, mini skirts, short or revealing dresses, plunging necklines, or sleeveless tops.
If you are dating a Mormon girl, then always wear a good shirt, jeans or pants, and avoid T-shirts with offensive wording or graphics. Modest dressing is the best policy here. When out on a date with a Mormon guy or girl, be very decent, courteous, and well-mannered. This means no swearing, loud talking, or making offensive jokes.
Your attempts at being funny or lightening the mood may backfire, and your date may be put off. This is a very delicate territory, so tread carefully! If you like your regular fix of alcohol or nicotine, then dating a Mormon probably isn't a good idea. They are taught to refrain from smoking, drinking, or experimenting with drugs. They even refrain from tea and coffee. So if you are caffeine junky, be sure that you can adjust to and accept your date's beliefs before going on a date.
If you can't, then it's best to move on. Mormons love to have fun, but they prefer keeping it clean, respectful, and something that everyone can enjoy. Take your date to a club with loud music and an open bar, or an R-rated or violent movie, and the prospects of it going well are daunting.
Well, maybe not a total disaster, that is a bit exaggerated. Mormons follow the law of Chastity; they believe that the intimate act of lovemaking must be saved for after marriage. They must refrain not only from sex, but also passionate kissing or similar physical contact, or any act that arouses such feelings.
Again, though the evolving times may have brought about a relaxation in this rule, it is still followed by many youngsters.
Mormon dating rules kissing
If you are dating a Mormon man or woman, be genuinely interested in their religion. I volunteer every week, I put others before myself, etc. I explained to her that from my perspective, if a religious person does something good, you can't trust them because they're doing it for the wrong reasons: When an atheist does something good, you know they're not doing it for any reason other than to help someone else. Anyone who's a decent human being should be able to know right from wrong and act accordingly.
She started crying when I explained this to her. She really likes me, and if she could change one thing about me it would be my lack of religion. I let her know it's not healthy to expect someone else to change - we can only control ourselves and not others.
She seems to be ok with that, and wants to continue our relationship, and also talks about wanting marriage and children, and raising those children to be mormon like her even if I'm not religious. During "Netflix and chill" the other night, I noticed there was a documentary about mormons. She said we couldn't watch it because the lady who produced the doc was formerly a professor at BYU but has since left the church, so she wouldn't have anything good to say.
She suggested instead watching something that was produced by the church itself. That conversation prompted me to find and read through this sub, and there's some seriously disturbing shit here.
It seems like mormons in particular are even more crazy than the majority of crazy religious people, and the manipulation and treatment of people who wish to think for themselves and challenge their beliefs is really frightening. As ex-mormons, can anyone here offer some insight about this girl, her religion, and what exactly I may be getting myself into if I continue dating her? I don't really care if she's religious or not, unless she brings it up all the time or tries to convert me.
Lots of really thorough replies. Thanks so much for the links.
I'll definitely talk with her about my concerns, and will be spending time with her family over the upcoming holidays so that will be a good chance to see how they treat me. She's told me the church is one of the most important things to her, but from what I've researched already there's no way I would subject my future children to this culture.
That will most likely be the deal breaker for her. Sadly, the general consensus of "convert or nope out" sounds like what will end up happening. I'm really glad to hear a few of you have stories of happy interfaith relationships, or leaving the church together, so there's always a chance.
I'll bring up some CES letter issues, let her know why I wouldn't want my children raised like this, and we'll see what happens. Thanks so much for all the time you've put into your replies. It's been really helpful already. Thanks again for the continued comments and replies to my edit. You've all been so helpful.
Yes; I suppose if each of us believe the other is brainwashed, there's going to be major problems later on. And also I thought it was weird she wore some kind of pants that come to her knees under her other pants, but I never asked about that.
It's winter here and I figured she was layering for warmth! Even if the church believes a bunch of crazy nonsense, and she believes it too, I still really like her and would like to see whether we can have some good intellectual conversations about this stuff.
Useful Tips and Ideas to Keep in Mind When Dating a Mormon
If kids ever came into the picture though, I wouldn't want to be isolated from them psychologically or banned from walking my daughter down the aisle someday. There are billions of other girls out there who I wouldn't have issues like this with. I'm not going to break up with her because of her religion, but if we can't come to some kind of understanding about what we'd do with kids